okay
so
if you adopt a ketogenic diet
you will feel bad
if you don’t go to bed before approx. 1am for more than like three nights in a row
you will feel bad
if you give up on a work of literary fiction whose length is ‘fuck all’ pages because fuck all happens in said work of literary fiction (eg gr8 gatsby)
you will feel bad
if you mix alcoholic stuff with sugary fruit juice instead of tap water when all you’re trying to do is get a bit nice before bed
you will feel bad

everything that happens kind of around now
is kind of lame

okay
okay
okay

1:52 am  •  13 April 2013  •  9 notes

ameri-can-dreams:

I CANT STAND WHEN PEOPLE MAKE FUN OF EATING DISORDERS

IF YOU MAKE FUN OF SOMEONE WITH AN E.D. I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND SHOOT YOU WITH A KNIFE

YOU OBVIOUSLY DONT KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO HAVE ONE YOU DUMB PIECE OF SIDEWALK CHALK

IM SO ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

12:04 am  •  13 March 2013  •  7 notes

a significant portion of the internet exists solely for the purpose of making sure everybody knows that tablets are a thing
i would like to “be in marketing” and make sly non-marketing posts to community-based websites and the posts will actually secretly advertise my product in a subliminal manner
i am very sure that this is not a hypothetical occupation and that there are people who actually do this
i wonder if they are happy/fulfilled
i sincerely believe that i would be happy/fulfilled if this was my occupation
people are naturally inclined to dislike those who are “in marketing” and i empathize with these people but
i could make a lot of money in exchange for doing very little work

10:36 pm  •  4 March 2013  •  18 notes

ponr
porn
porn
pron
prn
poarn
porn
i am sitting very still on account of sickness
i fear if i move bad things will happen
my body is becoming progressively incompetent
whereas my mind is very happy as it is now free to do whatever the fuck it likes on account of not having to tell my body what to do
this is what my mind is doing right now

11:16 pm  •  10 February 2013  •  15 notes

i find myself in boredom googling “best airports”
the best airport in the world according to people who do awards for that kind of thing is Incheon airport
Incheon airport is in South Korea and it is “more than an airport, beyond expectation”
i do not understand what that means

11:18 pm  •  2 February 2013  •  14 notes

the goal of everybody should be to achieve Serious Comatose State
Serious Comatose State is characterized by general not giving a shit about anything and ‘there is no reason to do anything like physical ever’
Serious Comatose State can be achieved by thinking about stuff 80%+ of the time rather than doing anything productive like art or watching nature documentaries

people act weird in sci-fi shows
it is very obvious that they are acting
this is a genre-wide problem and not a coincidence

there is a smiling asian man on my television

i am very still
i am aware that several years from now i will likely be unhappy unless i have received a sum of money => $2,000,000

11:39 pm  •  1 February 2013  •  14 notes

avaguenotion asked: I was once reading the abstract of a review of a well-know-but-underground poetry anthology published by an equally unknown-but-subterranean company, and they mentioned your name, or something like your name, or mentioned that you had "decided he wanted to write something that would not be used a day later to wrap the fish in." So through countless hours of calculated clicking I stumbled upon a lucrative trust fund. Seeing as I sustain myself through logorrhea i thought you might accept it?

what

2:36 pm  •  29 January 2013  •  4 notes

i look forward to days where i know where nothing is going to happen
i will plan many things like “healthy lifestyle” and “get up at reasonable time” and/or “read shit”
nothing happens and this is inevitable
the best part is even though i know 80% of the days for the past four months have been days like these, the best part is i can’t remember any of them
buying things and making lists of what i would purchase if i received a funds transfer of at least six million dollars are more or less the only things i remember
and the fact that american pmcs have stations on the western and northern coasts of australia is another thing but i just remembered that

1:28 am  •  29 January 2013  •  15 notes

what
yeah
let us talk about this in some degree of depth
this line of discourse will likely define each of us for the next several hours
we will be uncomfortable to a point wherein all we will want to do is kill small defenseless animals in order to replace said uncomfortableness with unbearable sadness and regret
the thing we are going to talk about is a metaphor for anything that everybody talks about that nobody wants to talk about
motherfuck
a spectacular alternative to all of this is to go out and save money by buying things at half price from department stores
yeah
let’s do that

12:57 am  •  29 January 2013  •  15 notes

i am more concerned with the mystery of why .gif files take like 12 times faster to load than anything else on the internet
i gained 2.5 kilograms over the ‘holidays’ and a positive of this is that the mass increase has not affected my facial features
1 and 2 problem, respectively
i am existing within touching distance of a cavernous void of endless suffering and/or doom and there is nothing i can do about this apart from receive a large sum of money from a mysterious benefactor who wants nothing in return and there won’t be any sort of ‘debt to be paid’ like ominously

9:49 am  •  15 January 2013  •  16 notes